Irony is the Shackles of Youth

Thanks to the wonderful Kittyknowsthings, on my Hobbit fic An Unexpected Landing. As anyone who has followed me for awhile knows, it is super easy to get me to post more of what I'm writing. This is another of my Hobbit fanfics. It's unfinished. I was going to post it on Tumblr, but then I realize even this first section is almost 5,000 words. The entire thing is almost 11,000 words long, and I'm not done. When did it get so long? It's set in modern times, but all the races and cultures of Middle Earth exist.

Tagged for: AU, PTSD, Thorin is an Empath, cultural differences, pre-relationship if you want to read it that way

( Empath Thorin, Hobbit AU fanfic, PG-13, unfinished )

Part 1: Where Derek walks in the woods a whole lot

Preview:

The call for a Special Forces alphapack had come in from a small city on the edge of a wilderness preserve sometime just after dawn on a Thursday. Derek hadn’t been at HQ when the call came in. He’d been in bed at his apartment, trying to recover from a previous mission that had gone wrong in a truly spectacular fashion. All he wanted to do was sleep for a week, but when the videoscreen beeped he got up out of bed.

“Hale.” Which was all the greeting Derek ever gave. He only activated sound, leaving the screen blank. The last thing he needed was someone from HQ to see his naked ass as he stumbled around in his dark bedroom, trying to find clothing.

“We have a situation of some sort just south of the western preserve.” Lydia was a red witch, a very powerful red witch, that could make even the toughest alphas jump when she gave the order. Derek was simultaneously impressed and annoyed by her ability even as he pulled on pants and mentally rearranged his planned schedule for his day off. “They’re calling for an alphapack.”

“I’m on leave,” Derek reminded her. If they were calling in alphas on leave, it had to be bad. He found a shirt, sniffed it, and decided that it wasn’t too bad. Laundry hadn’t been high on his list of things to do for the last week.

“I know.” Derek snorted at the lack of apologies from Lydia. Typical when she was determined to get her way. “We’ve already got one alphapack deployed dealing with a few rogue omegas, three on guard rotation at the detention centers since there was a full moon last night, and two others in districts too far to get here in a reasonable amount of time. We’re pulling in the second string now.”

A lack of apologies and insults? Must be big. “What’s going on?” Derek pulled on a pair of socks. His wallet and keys went into his pocket.

“There’s a missing established pack. Nine werewolves. The local law enforcement found the alpha in pieces in the woods. They’re refusing to go back out to look for the rest of the pack and we need to find out what happened.”

“Wait. They found the alpha in pieces and eight missing betas?” Omegas were often found torn to pieces if they turned vicious and strayed into an established family pack’s territory. Occasionally, it happened to betas if for some reason their alpha went crazy on them. Usually by the time the alpha went after the second beta, the others in the pack banded together to take the alpha out. Sometimes they even succeeded.

But an entire pack? Even the alphapack would have problems taking down a pack even with weapons and back-up. It just didn’t happen.

“There’s already rumors spreading about this. Law enforcement wants to keep in low key, but...” Lydia signed over the line. She sounded tired and Derek wondered if they’d pulled her in before her shift to coordinate this. “An alpha is dead and its presumed the rest of the pack is too. We need you out there yesterday to figure out what is going on.”

His day off could wait. Derek pushed his feet into shoes and began to do up the laces. “I’ll be there in less than an hour.”

Read the whole thing on AO3

Wolf Bone

Someone else knows that wolves have a penis bone. Not only that, someone else wrote a fic featuring it.

I WILL NOT BE THE WEIRDEST ONE IN THIS FANDOM. SOMEONE HAS ALREADY WRITTEN ABOUT WOLF PENIS BONES IN A FIC. THEY HAVE SET A PRECEDENT AND I WILL JUST BE FOLLOWING IN THEIR FOOTSTEPS. THIS MAKES ME FEEL SO MUCH BETTER ABOUT INCLUDING BACULUMS IN MY FANFIC.

Lest you think I didn't use the hours I spent at the courthouse waiting to be dismissed from jury duty productively.

( TW/Ghosthunters fusion, fragment )

I am reading The Sentinel fanfiction, which I don't think I can recommend as a whole since most authors seem to think that if the main characters have sex, puppies and rainbows follow them ever afterwards and all of life's problems are fixed. I feel like most stories are almost the exact opposite of the romance novel trope where if the two characters would have a five minute conversation then the entire reason for the book would be solved. In The Sentinel fic, since the two characters know each other's every feeling, all their problems are solved. Sorry, life doesn't work that way.

I was telling miome that despite this, and the fact that I've only ever seen half an episode of the series, I keep reading. Mostly because I keep wondering how much of what I'm seeing repeatedly in fanfics was actually based on the show and how much is fanon. Of course, Miome asked me what I remembered about the half episode I'd seen. Below is my summary.

"There was a curly haired guy and a macho man. They were in South America. I think curly haired guy had been kidnapped? Anyway I remember a village and that macho man kicked ass. Then there was a black panther. I didn't get that part."

Miome tells me I pretty much summed up the series there. :D

Also, the AC for our apartment is still not fixed. This is getting ridiculous. We've called the apartment complex several times and nothing. Not pleased.

All I have seen is a minute long trailer, and I already wish there was fanfiction for the Avengers movie. Hell, I'd be tempted to write it myself if I didn't know that it was going to get jossed all to hell come May 2012.

Although miome and I came up with a hilarious snippet that ended with Tony Stark feeling the need to write a letter of apology to some dwarven engineer for telling Thor about cockrings. ^_^

In other news, I made salmon with tomatillo sauce that was absolutely fantastic. Sauce was a bit more work than I thought it would be, but you can make it ahead of time and just warm it up. Will have to remember that.

And at the end of this post, spell checker does not like the words tomatillo, jossed, cockring, dwarven, or fanfiction. Fanfiction and jossed I can understand, but the other three are just mind boggling. Clearly the Firefox spell checker needs to get out more.

I have a bad feeling that fanfic is once again going to get me sucked into another series.

In this case, it'll be USA White Collar. Time to add it to my Netflix list and see what it's like. Sigh.

I think this might have been an earlier attempt at Knowledge is Power, but I'm not 100%. I don't remember where I was going with it. Oh well. It's something short to post.

( Untitled, Digimon fragment, PG )

The next thing in this notebook is titled "PWP, Digimon" and is about 2 pages long. That ought to be interesting.

EDIT: I just started reading the PWP. I wrote Ken/Digimon Emperor PWP. Why do I not remember this? And why did I stop? ;_;

Even though I promised this part almost a month ago, I only just now had time to type it up. I still haven't finished part 2b, but that hasn't stopped me from starting part 3. Ah well. I already knew this was going to be one of those stories that I was going to write just the scenes that I wanted to rather than all that I have plotted out.

Part 1 | Bit o' world building

( Young Avengers, Therapy Vampire, AU, PG-13, Part 2a )

Some people expressed some interest in the story behind the second drabble in this post. And since I can be suckered into writing just about anything, I thought I do a bit more in that universe.

( Young Avengers fragment, PG-13 for character death )

I tried to leave this in skylark97's comments in response to her putting out the next part of her story so quickly. But I kind of exceeded the max comment length. Oops? So here's the next part of my pawn shop story

( Pawn shop story, part 2, PG so far... )

I had completely forgotten I'd written so much of this idea until I was flipping through a notebook looking for an empty page. Of all the Young Avengers, I always feel like I have the hardest time getting Teddy's character right. I feel like I have a good grasp of everyone else, but just can't seem to get Teddy quite right. This is the only thing I've written where I didn't get that feeling so I'm really proud of it.

Now I just have to convince myself that I won't screw his characterization up if I write more of it. -_-

( Young Avengers, Late Night Conversations, fragment, PG )